Forgiveness

“…and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors…for if you forgive others their trespasses, your Heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Matthew 6: 11b, 14-15

“Does God exist?” How many times have we, in post-modern Western culture, heard this question? Thousand of books fill our shelves with the answer to this question. Yet I would like to suggest an additional piece of evidence that points to God being alive and active in our world: forgiveness.

Recently, I had a stirring conversation with a friend of mine in the process of repentance. One of the obstacles in this person’s process was the hurt they carried in their heart over accusations and misunderstandings they experienced from other Christians. Forgiveness seemed like the last thing in the world they wanted to give. And understandably so.

It reminded me of the lack of forgiveness I experienced from someone else that I had once offended. That person did not want to work through their hurt—it was not worth their effort, so-to-speak, to pursue reconciliation with me. It was much easier to just remain upset. I had offended them—I had sinned against them—why should they forgive me? I simply didn’t deserve it.

In so many ways, I cannot agree more. I don’t deserve forgiveness from them. I did wound them. Deeply. I wronged them. Yet initially, I was shocked by their reaction. For me, having grown up in the Christian culture of grace and forgiveness, I thought it was simply standard to dish out grace. What I have been realizing of late is that apart from God, we have no reason to forgive one another.

Jesus shares a convicting parable with Peter when asked the question, “How many times should I forgive my brother when he sins against me?” From Matthew 18: (ESV)

“The kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents {millions of dollars}. And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made. So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, 'Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything. And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt.

But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii, {a few measly bucks!} and seizing him, he began to choke him, saying, 'Pay what you owe.' So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, 'Have patience with me, and I will pay you.' He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt.

When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their master all that had taken place.

Then his master summoned him and said to him, 'You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?' And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt. So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart."

I think the key phrase in that last verse is from your heart. If I may be so bold as to share an observation…

Christians—especially those who’ve grown up in the church—have a unique ability to be Pharisaical. (I speak from personal experience here!) We do, and say, but sometimes it is not representative of what is truly in our hearts.

There is plenty of reason for that. We are taught that sometimes we have to do the right thing even when we don’t feel like it, and give our hearts time to catch up—that is sometimes what obedience means. I would never disagree. But sometimes the result is that we forget to reflect upon the true condition of our hearts. Neglecting our heart’s true condition is hypocrisy and religiosity – something we must strive as Christians to avoid.

What I am getting at in all of this musing is that forgiveness from the heart is not something we in our natural selves can accomplish.

A good friend of mine once told me that the ability to forgive is a gift from God—we cannot muster up grace for someone else on our own. Apart from God, we simply have no supply of forgiveness. We have only ourselves—and our natural selves are entrenched in sin, with a self-centeredness that demands the world bow its knee to us, to our demands and needs. When our pride is at the nucleus, it is no wonder we think we are entitled to hold a grudge.

The truth is, the only place we can find the ability to forgive is God. He is the source. As we receive from God, so we go and give to others. Until we realize the extent of the forgiveness we have been given from God—a completely, 100% cancelled debt—we cannot even begin to understand how to forgive those around us.

When God is the epi-center by which our lives revolve, we have a never-ending source of forgiveness at our disposal. As we draw upon His great mercy and grace, we can dish out the same degree of complete and 100% forgiveness to others.

May God grant to us a deeper realization of how much we’ve been forgiven – so that we may extend the same depth of genuine forgiveness to those around us and in doing so, give evidence that a God of endless mercy is alive and actively involved in our world.